Narcissism vs. Awareness

‘It‘s the difference between the not-self narcissist as it is clinically understood. It is clear that they are not aware, not aware in the sense that they are not aware of the environment and the human forces that are there, all of the things that are played out in the movie, because, after all, that is not what self-love within the context of Human Design is about. Learning to see the beauty of one’s own process simply by being correct. That‘s where the love comes from. You begin to deeply appreciate that you’re equipped, that you are uniquely capable of handling the ‘this and that’ of what it is to be.

The very fact that you can actually begin to experience that means that your mind is a mind that no longer is pre-occupied, it may still have its flashing moments, but it is no longer preoccupied with determining your life, which means automatically you‘re more aware of the world around you than you‘ve ever been, and more aware of those beings that are there around you more than you’ve ever been. This is one of the things about terminologies and what it truly means to understand what the not-self world is really about. It‘s about locking everybody in.

You don’t accept the authority that we accept. That makes you a maverick, that makes you the outsider, that makes you the person not to be admired, not to be liked, not to be loved. And you‘re only going to get that wonderful, those terrific accolades the moment that you bend over and do what you’re told, and everybody’s just so happy.

Your own authority is really an amazing thing. The nine-centered community is small. It hasn’t really grown into its new body and spread its wings yet. We have extraordinary potentials. And it begins with liberation from what all these anti-narcissistic themes are about. It is liberation from having to be concerned that you cannot survive because you do not have someone else‘s support. The age of the bargain is coming to an end. All of this is a fear game. It always is. Everything begins with fear. Fear that you cannot make it alone; fear that you need the support of others, fear. That fear leads to a lot of acceptance of the authority of others and the loss of self.

This is not about ‘I am for myself and nothing else.’ This is I am for myself so I can be something here; that I can be here for the other. It does not stop me from being a loving and concerned involved parent; because once you‘re correct within yourself you just watch where it goes. Because that’s the point, because it‘s the only place, and this is where you meet that confrontation with the outside world that sees your movement towards your process as something that is so alienating for them.

It is trusting in a higher authority and that higher authority is your inner authority. It‘s different. It‘s not trusting in everybody else’s authority, or the demands that go with all of those authorities because there are all those demands that go with it, that you cannot be this way, that you must be this way or that way or the other way in order to satisfy this thing or that thing and you bend. You‘re not here for the other until you‘re here for yourself first. You‘ve spent your whole damn life being lost with the other, your whole life never being you.

Here is where you get to see the fragility of human beings. They‘re so fragile. It‘s so difficult for them to say look, I have to come first. And part of that is the way in which they understand it’s going to be accepted or dealt with or reacted to. All of the things that we’ve looked at, coming out in different ways about how one is selfish and not doing enough for the other and caring enough for the other. You spend all your time doing this and what about us. It goes on and on and on. It‘s endless.

We are not in any sense comparable to the seven-centered fear and concept of the narcissist. But we are, in fact, their worst nightmare. It‘s something to really grasp.’

Ra Uru Hu Lectures